Precious Moments

Just a couple things that have happened recently that I don't ever want to forget about. It's all quite random, so sorry!

Macey is now fully potty trained! Hallelujah! She went back and forth about whether she was a baby or a big girl. The Pappi Fairy came last weekend to take away her pappies. She was quite traumatized by the entire ordeal. Prior to that night, she would break down into tears every time we would mention the Pappi Fairy. When she finally came, Macey only cried for two nights and a little during the day about it. She's fine now, and she hasn't even asked for a pappi!

Adam was reading to Mikayla last night at bedtime, and he asked her, "How many days are there until Christmas?" Mikayla replied, "by my calculations, three!"

Last night, Macey was so tired because she hadn't had a nap. At about 8, she came and wanted to sit in my lap. She curled up on me and fell right to sleep. She hasn't slept in my arms since she was an infant. She has always wanted to sleep in her bed. It was so sweet, and I want to cherish it always.

"Mommy! Did you know that there are some people who don't believe that Christmas is Jesus' birthday?!" Mikayla said to me in the car the other day. I smiled, and said that I did indeed know that. She then said, "Yeah. They believe in Pocahontas." After thinking about it for a while and laughing, I realized that she meant "Hanukah." I thought it was the cutest mistake ever!

The other day, Macey cupped my face her hands and kissed me. Then she said, "Yuv you, Momma." She is the sweetest little thing in the world.

Adam was reading to Mikayla last night at bedtime, and he asked her, "How many days are there until Christmas?" Mikayla replied, "by my calculations, three!"

Today, we were at Academy getting some last minute Christmas gifts. We went to the bathroom, and the soap dispensers weren't working. I set Macey down, and I was about to fish out my hand sanitizer, when Mikayla said, "Hold on! Let me go tell the owners." If I hadn't have stopped her, she would have gone!

Mikayla has also decided that she has a boyfriend. Not that he has asked her to be his girlfriend, or that she is allowed to have one. There's a little boy in her class named Emerson, and he and Mikayla are good friends. They are reading parnters in class, and he can read chapter books already. They hang out all the time at school. Emerson lives just around the corner from us; his parents went to Hardin-Simmons in Abilene; his mom is an English teacher, and they go to Gateway to church. Mikayla has said several times that she is going to marrry Emerson, which I think is pretty cute. We'll see.

I was sitting on the couch today, and Macey comes to crawl up on me, and she says, "Mommy, you best my friend." She is so sweet, she just melts my heart.

No words...

Yesterday, in Newtown, Connecticut, a mad man committed an act so horrific and grotesque that there are really no words for it. He killed his own mother, then went to the local elementary school, shot and killed 27 people. Twenty of them were kindergarten students. There's not much known as of yet as to motive, or any specifics.

More than other extreme acts of violence and terror, this shooting hurts me and has affected me in a way that I haven't ever felt before. Every time I think about the horror and terror those poor children must have felt in their final minutes, it breaks my heart all over again. I can’t possibly conceive what must have gone through those teachers' minds to protect their precious pupils.

Maybe it's because not only am I teacher, but I am also the mother of a kindergarten student. I could not imagine Mikayla being that terrified, nor could I imagine having to go to her school to identify her body.

This morning, Mikayla was acting up, and I sent her to her room. I had to go in there to spank her, and I completely broke down in tears. There are twenty sets of parents in Connecticut who will never be able to even hug their children again, much less spank them. I held on to Mikayla and boo-hooed. I explained to her that there is evil in the world, and I told her what had happened.

Trying to understand why or how this could happen is nearly impossible when taken from a secular standpoint. It is completely nonsensical, and most are left struggling to understand how something like this could possibly happen to them, or in their neighborhood, or in their country, etc.

As a society, America will blame video games, Hollywood and the glorification of violence for the shooting. Information will come out about the shooter such as he is mental disturbed, was bullied, or that he had some extreme personality, therefore giving people a way to somehow rationalize how this could have happened. The left-wingers will blame that fact that assault rifles are legal, and they will cry for gun legislation reform. The right-wingers will decry, "Guns don't kill people; people kill people," and they will claim their second amendment rights. Neither of these viewpoints gets to the true heart of the issue.

When trying to understand shootings like Newtown from a spiritual standpoint, one can understand that shooting rampages and mass killings are a product of Satan. I want to make myself clear that I am not allowing for the excuse, "the devil made me do it." God gave each of us free will to choose to either follow Him, or to choose our own path in life.

When we choose to forge our own path in life, we are essentially saying no to God and His path for our life. When we shut out God then that opens our life to Satan's influence. When Satan is able to get a foothold in our lives, then he begins to speak to us in ways that can distort our view of reality. He is an expert in deceit, and he knows exactly what to say to us. Proverbs 12:20 tells us that, "Deceit is in the hearts of those who plot evil..." When we shut out God long enough and extremely enough, we can no longer hear His voice. We can only hear the voice of the enemy: his deceptive voice.

Therefore, the short answer is that this shooter was acting upon the deception that grew and festered in his heart. His heart grew hard, and he became cold and wicked. Outside factors no doubt fed into the lies and deceit that began to be his truth. He became so full of hate and rage that he took it out on defenseless children and their teachers.

As Christians, we must remain vigilant so as not to succumb to Satan’s deceit. We must refer back to God’s Word, because only He is the way, truth and life. (John 4:16) When we are far from God, it is easier for us to begin to believe Satan’s lies. The world has started to call being far from God “depression.” The world has labeled it as a mental disorder or a chemical imbalance in the brain.

Psalm 37:4 tells us to delight in the Lord. Nehemiah 8:10 tells us “Do not grieve, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.” If someone is so immersed in the Lord that he or she is delighting themselves daily in the Lord, there is no room for depression in his or her heart. When we allow the Lord to be the King of our lives, there can be no loneliness, no sadness and nothing that we cannot face with the comfort and strength of Christ. That’s not to say that it is easy, or that the path is clear. It takes faith and courage to follow Christ daily, and it is a struggle for many, including me.

God gave each of us free will so that when we choose to worship him, it is true worship, because we are choosing Him. Please, my dear children, choose Him. Do not believe the enemy, or cause your heart to harden. Soften your heart to God and follow Him, and He will give you the desires of your heart.